Friday, October 07, 2005
lamentations
4 more days to baccalaureate. I have been feeling immensely low and depressed for many reasons these few days. I don't understand why they seem to hate us so much. I felt resentful at first but now i sort of understand the stance tt they r taking. I get it now. I don't want to seem heartless. I don't want us to seem heartless. Even more so the legacy and memory that we leave behind...need it be so negative? Need it be so terrible? There is the pausity in communication and rapport between us. There is an estrangement. We are still like strangers and tt pains me quite abit. Shites...henceforth this really sucks:(
I do feel a sense of relieve tt it would end soon despite a subtle undercurrent of sadness...so tired. I juz want to get over and done with the dratted As. But i honestly don't think im working HARD enough. Hee...studying in the void is really not as productive as i would have liked it to be... yeah distracting...but i keep making excuses for myself. It's the last time we can sit study together like tt so...haiz indulge a littel lah. Oh...we sang together again yesterday:) Hee...i wuz juz sitting in the void studying when jo started to hum Give Me Your Hand.
Jo: *hum*
Swee: jo r u humming give me your hand?
Jo: yup, *cont to hum*
Swee: *joins in humming e sop part*
Jo: We need a bass...Handy!!
(Handy comes around at perfect timing)
Swee & Jo: come sing with us.
Handy: (apprehensive) what here?
(LL and jamie comes along as well)
LL: are u sure here??
Jo: We sing like pppppppppp.
Swee: Handy hurry give note!!
Handy: Doo...
(So we all start singing, then more people start streaming out from the canteen with plates)
Joey: Omg y r u guys singing...
(Anywayz we ignored joey and all of us agglomerated at the table and juz sang haha and of course he joined in after tt, from old time faves to Christmas carols:) until we were interrupted...)
Prince: Who is the idiot who is singing Christmas carols in Oct?? Is it u lot?
LL: Erm yes sir...
Prince: BUT it's OCTOBER! Alright, but keep it down...yeah...and clear up the rubbish on the table after u all are done. Ok.
(So in e end we decided to all troop down to the concourse and sing there lah...until we all were happy...)
Haha...yeah lah one of the rare occasions when we actually get to meet like tt to sing...i mean nowadays it's juz mad cheong. But i really feel like im burning out lah. I feel this sense of hopelessness because there is juz too much to do! I mean geog is so daunting manz. And lit...im dead because i haven't even read most of the stories in vintage...and art...not even sure can get the A because of all the terrible rumours zooming abt saying tt the examiners r marking down again this year. Dead, so dead. i need to get my butt up there n write now...write like mad...n i can't believe im gg for art party tmr...shites i feel guilty........ but i wld feel even more guilty not gg lah...i mean the rest also got exams what n they r gg to cook cuz it's pot luck...
Ok. Ok. i will survive...i will survive. God gave me so much the least i can do is give back by investing in my talents and working hard...4 weeks left, 30 odd days... then it's freedom, liberty!! For at least a good 6-8 mths:)
I do feel a sense of relieve tt it would end soon despite a subtle undercurrent of sadness...so tired. I juz want to get over and done with the dratted As. But i honestly don't think im working HARD enough. Hee...studying in the void is really not as productive as i would have liked it to be... yeah distracting...but i keep making excuses for myself. It's the last time we can sit study together like tt so...haiz indulge a littel lah. Oh...we sang together again yesterday:) Hee...i wuz juz sitting in the void studying when jo started to hum Give Me Your Hand.
Jo: *hum*
Swee: jo r u humming give me your hand?
Jo: yup, *cont to hum*
Swee: *joins in humming e sop part*
Jo: We need a bass...Handy!!
(Handy comes around at perfect timing)
Swee & Jo: come sing with us.
Handy: (apprehensive) what here?
(LL and jamie comes along as well)
LL: are u sure here??
Jo: We sing like pppppppppp.
Swee: Handy hurry give note!!
Handy: Doo...
(So we all start singing, then more people start streaming out from the canteen with plates)
Joey: Omg y r u guys singing...
(Anywayz we ignored joey and all of us agglomerated at the table and juz sang haha and of course he joined in after tt, from old time faves to Christmas carols:) until we were interrupted...)
Prince: Who is the idiot who is singing Christmas carols in Oct?? Is it u lot?
LL: Erm yes sir...
Prince: BUT it's OCTOBER! Alright, but keep it down...yeah...and clear up the rubbish on the table after u all are done. Ok.
(So in e end we decided to all troop down to the concourse and sing there lah...until we all were happy...)
Haha...yeah lah one of the rare occasions when we actually get to meet like tt to sing...i mean nowadays it's juz mad cheong. But i really feel like im burning out lah. I feel this sense of hopelessness because there is juz too much to do! I mean geog is so daunting manz. And lit...im dead because i haven't even read most of the stories in vintage...and art...not even sure can get the A because of all the terrible rumours zooming abt saying tt the examiners r marking down again this year. Dead, so dead. i need to get my butt up there n write now...write like mad...n i can't believe im gg for art party tmr...shites i feel guilty........ but i wld feel even more guilty not gg lah...i mean the rest also got exams what n they r gg to cook cuz it's pot luck...
Ok. Ok. i will survive...i will survive. God gave me so much the least i can do is give back by investing in my talents and working hard...4 weeks left, 30 odd days... then it's freedom, liberty!! For at least a good 6-8 mths:)
// posted by grace @ 9:32 PM 
