A bed of roses & their thorns

How does one know when it's the right time to advance forward?
How does one get the courage to move towards...
How does one know when to give it all up?
How do you give it up?

I don't know...I don't even know where to start & I haven't even started yet so I can't give up. Yet I'm tired. So tired. Why should I continue when it probably doesn't even matter anymore. One chapter is closed & sometimes I can't wait to embrace the new. Yet what is this nostalgia tt I feel I cannot let go. I still, after all this time, cannot let go. Sometimes I think it's not fair...yet I can't imagine any other outcome from this whole situation...there is no reality, only a figment of my imagination. Maybe I was imagining the whole episode to be something worth waiting for when in fact I wuz waiting in vain. What will the next chapter hold? I really do wonder...the future is like a beautiful stranger. I'm in love with her, because I don't know, I can still hope & tt's the joy of not knowing:)

...Missing the one who is missing all my life...